Hopefulness vs. Expectations

If you give without expecting anything in return, the chance of getting hurt go down significantly, sometimes to nothing.

This is hard to do, if you're like me and you believe in the goodness of others.

If you give while remaining hopeful that there will be reciprocation, you might get hurt but that's life.

If there's anything I've learned through those difficult life lessons, it's that the only person you can rely on is yourself.

That said, be good to yourself. Be your own best friend. Recognize that you've got what it takes to make yourself whole.

Love yourself.

Keep the hope, but lose the expectations.

Counting recent blessings

I'm sittin on my porch with the pup.

Actual downtime...what a blessing.

Actual spring weather...another blessing.

Finished work early and rode bike...

Can it get any better?

Apparently so!

Two of the kindest people on earth who I'm blessed to call friends just announced they're having their first baby.

Blessings all around.

It's been an amazing three hours :-)

So metal...

1. Catching up to and passing a runner who's been lapping you for months.

2. Making your own granola. While wearing you ex's favorite concert t-shirt. As Iggy Pop blares on your phonograph.

3. Getting to see reggae legends and your fave local reggae band, in the same evening. With good, chill friends.

4. Counting down the days and hours until the big meeting is over and you can have a good stretch and cry during Bikram yoga. The heat instantly dries the tears, so nobody's the wiser.

5. Making out. In your ex's favorite concert t-shirt. While listening to The Velvet Underground on the phonograph. And then snacking on your uber-tasty homemade granola.

6. Fantastically long showers. The ones where you sit down partway through and pretend you're in a rainforest. You know what I'm talking about.

7. Possessing the ability to pick up random small, light household objects with your toes.

8. Taking your dog on two walks after work. Because he deserves it. Every day.

9. Liking your job, even on the most hectic, mind-splitting days.

10. The mountains of Colorado. Yeah, you know the ones...the Rockies. Heaven.

Metal.

Overheard in my head....and outta my mouth

"Millenials are cleverly-disguised robots dressed in Ann Taylor and Brooks Brothers. And occasionally Old Navy. So scary."

"Stop. Hammertime." MANY times. I dork out often.

"Email sucks. It's like a person who pokes you continuously all day long. It huuurts."

"I want a cheese toasty. And a beer. And some canned pears. Blended."

"Take a breath. Breathe, now...do it."

"Most women I know have had the bad, embarrassing, disappointing sex that was shown on 'Girls'...but none of us want to relive that shit!"

"I need a vacation. Soon. Or I may go mental."

"I am willing to singlehandedly attempt to resurrect the genius that was shorts/Birks/wool socks. Heaven."

"4:00 a.m. is my new wake time. Word. Gonna turn in like a grama erry night, yo."

Nibble, chomp

Last week was one of non-stop nibbling, which is to say I was busy from wake to sleep.

Today was a case of big 'ol chomps. Had a major meeting in which big decisions were finally made and are now moving along, and my workout was a Danger Will Robinson Level 9.5 hour-long spin class. I pushed more than I ever believe I have and got into the best zone during the big hills sections. I'm already incredibly sore, but that's the payoff.

I have to say, if I had to choose a nibble or a chomp day, I'd go with chomp. It feels fantastic to score big. However, you need nibble days to keep the peace and remind yourself that steady pace gets big results, too, it just takes longer.

The same could be said for tri training. Steady workouts during the week, with longer ones on the weekend make for a good combo.

Looking forward to a week of nibbles and chomps, getting together with my IM mentor and my coach, & getting out of town for a bit...but only after the workout is done.

Oh, and I'm so jonesing for warm weather. Long rides are much more pleasant in 50 degrees or above.

Clarifyah

Respectively - in the order given

Respectfully - given marked or proper respect

Two very similar-sounding words, with wholly different meanings.

True story: When used incorrectly in a sentence, can create ire and consternation. :-)

On a side note, here are some of my favorite made-up words:

HA HA - NO!      RIGHT
Essentric               Eccentric

Supposably          Supposedly

Expecially             Especially

Febuary               February

Nuculer               Nuclear

Ruff                     Roof 

Acrossed            Across

Excetera             Et cetera

Buh'nn                Button

Mischivious        Mischievous

That which does not destroy me...

....nourishes me.

Or, something like that.

I'm a real stickler when it comes to balance. I value my personal time. I want to see my family and friends, spend time with my dog, and get some "me" time on the calendar. If these things don't happen, I get nutty.

I've managed to roll with the crazy this week, and while I am pretty exhausted today I don't feel terrible. I might go so far as to say I feel more alive?

I really enjoy my job. Getting to work closely, daily, with some of the best and brightest medical minds in the country is a blessing. It's something I enjoyed back at BJC, and due to my new role as program manager here at AH I am on the forefront of patient safety initatives, therapeutic taskforces and resource integration. There is so much that goes into health care management and physician support, and I'm thankful to be a part of it.

The longer hours, travel, and non-stop workload are part of the package, and I welcome it all. However, the downside is it makes my schedule all wonky which can thwart my attempts at balance IF I DON'T PLAN.

Which brings to mind this quote: No one plans to fail - they fail to plan.

In a discussion with my coach last night, the great Jeremy Koerber, the topic of sleep came up. Ah, sleep. Not an easy thing for me. He said that the more I get, the better my muscles will recover, the more it will help me with reaching my goal weight, etc. I get that. And I want that.

I have no problem working out late at night. In fact, this helps me to sleep better. For most people I know it wakes them up. If I train in the morning, it wakes me up. If I train at night, it helps me sleep better. Kind of a win, win.

I just need to be steadfast about creating a schedule and sticking with it.

That is my goal this weekend. Get the schedule down for the next few months.

Oh, and sleep. :-)